The D&D Corner!

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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Rath Darkblade » Thu Nov 09, 2017 6:36 pm

Even MORE Favourite D&D Last Words

41. "Hey, cool! A five-headed dragon! Bet if we kill it, we'll get MAJOR experience points!"

42. "He's a ranger! Rangers are good, so he won't stab me in the back." [Assassin masquerading as a ranger]

43. [To a Drow High Priestess] "Whoa! Hey, honey, what's your sign?"

44. "My 'Know Alignment' spell says he's Neutral Good, so he won't hurt us."

45. "What do you mean, my spell bounces off of it?"

46. "Ooh, I knew I shouldn't have cast that Earthquake spell underground..."

47. "Hey, aren't you that guy we're supposed to kill?"

48. [Really badly fumbled Perception roll] "Dragon? What dragon? I don't see any dragon!"

49. "Oh come on! Since when did we suddenly shift to Call of Cthulhu?"

50. "You don't want to eat me! I haven't had a bath in weeks!"
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Rath Darkblade » Wed Nov 29, 2017 2:29 am

Erm... no reply, eh? ;)

Yet More Favourite D&D Last Words

51. "Why do I have the feeling this is going to hurt?" [It did. For a short period of time.]

52. "Yeah? Well I bet you're not so tough without those glowing swords of yours!"

53. [One PC to another] "It's okay, I was in this dungeon in Brian's campaign. I know where everything is."

54. "Okay, tough guy. I'll even let you get the first hit! But you'd better kill me with that one hit, 'cause if I get up, I'll rip you apart!"

55. "You want to step outside? C'mon! Let's go!" [Walks out door, forgetting he's in a castle floating in midair.]

56. "I dare you to hit me again!"

57. "How the hell can it get back up again after all the damage we just did to it?"

58. "All right! We subdued the dragon!"

59. "Giant spiders, huh? I light the webs with my torch." [Webs were connected to explosive charges as a trap]

60. "I use my reverse stroke skill to hit the thief with the knife in my back!"
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Rath Darkblade » Mon Dec 11, 2017 4:18 am

Hmm... no reply, eh? :(
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Tawmis » Mon Dec 11, 2017 11:59 am

Rath Darkblade wrote:Hmm... no reply, eh? :(


Well. I think it's just me and you who play D&D here. :lol:
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Rath Darkblade » Sat Dec 16, 2017 2:28 am

:lol: Well, that's as may be, but I still think these lines are pretty amusing... ;)
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Tawmis » Sat Dec 16, 2017 3:31 pm

Rath Darkblade wrote::lol: Well, that's as may be, but I still think these lines are pretty amusing... ;)


They are - but in most cases, you need to be familiar with D&D to get some of the references. :)
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Rath Darkblade » Mon Dec 18, 2017 6:01 am

Well... here are some last words that you can enjoy without having played D&D. ;)

Even Some MORE Favourite D&D Last Words

61. "No way. NOBODY'S that accurate with just a throwing dag-"

62. "Dark Jedi, Dark Schmedi. That Force stuff is all a load of bull anyway..."

63. "Huh? How can I possibly have the rocket launcher pointed the wrong way?"

64. "Shhhh! The dragon's asleep! If we're really quiet, we can steal its treasure without waking it up!"

65. "Oh, gee, poison. Big deal! I only have to roll a '2' to save!" [Guess what he rolled.]

66. "Since when can that kind of monster do that much damage?"

67. "A kobold? I kill it!" [Polymorphed Nyca-Daemon]

68. "I drink my Fire Immunity potion, step into the cave, and challenge the Dragon!" [Too bad that, despite rumours to the contrary, it was a Blue Dragon - and breathed ice...]

69. "A black ball floating in midair? Neat! I grab it!" ['Twas a Sphere of Annihilation]

70. "Stupid skeleton thinks it can scare me by wearing some rotting old robe, huh? I smash it with my mace!" [Um, that's a Lich...]
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Tawmis » Tue Dec 19, 2017 8:53 pm

Rath Darkblade wrote:Even Some MORE Favourite D&D Last Words
62. "Dark Jedi, Dark Schmedi. That Force stuff is all a load of bull anyway..."
63. "Huh? How can I possibly have the rocket launcher pointed the wrong way?"


Well, now you have ventured out of D&D and into SciFi. :lol:

Rath Darkblade wrote:64. "Shhhh! The dragon's asleep! If we're really quiet, we can steal its treasure without waking it up!"


Just ask Bilbo how that worked out...

Rath Darkblade wrote:68. "I drink my Fire Immunity potion, step into the cave, and challenge the Dragon!" [Too bad that, despite rumours to the contrary, it was a Blue Dragon - and breathed ice...]


Ever get DUNGEON magazine?

It has one of the most - INCREDIBLE - well thought out 2 page dungeon side adventures - EVER.

A local town has found itself under the ruling thumb of a white dragon that demands treasure for it's "protection"... and the town is tired of it, and hires a party of heroes to put an end to the White Dragon.

White Dragons, being the weakest of the dragons in D&D, makes the party underestimate what's about to happen - and prepares them for cold based attacks, since White Dragons breathe frost based damage.

Unfortunately, said dragon is an albino Red Dragon.

It was one of my favorite adventures to run - because the party learned to never, ever, underestimate ANY dragon of ANY color.

This person disagrees with me and the uniqueness of the adventure.
__________________________________________________________
Changeling By R. Nathaniel Waldbauer
AD&D Levels 8-10
A side-trek, so essentially a 2-pager. This time the party hears about a white dragon that has just shown up. Turns out it’s an albino red dragon. With no treasure. Lame screw job. I’ll never understand why this sort of thing became popular. All it does it encourage the party to be paranoid, which slows things down. This is different than a mimic or trapper. Those are one-shot ‘gotchas.’, almost traps. This is just an intentional screw-job. LAME.

__________________________________________________________


Which just tells me, his DM probably ran him through, and his character got burned.

Literally.
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Rath Darkblade » Wed Dec 20, 2017 6:32 am

Whoops, I mixed up my Blue Dragon (breathes lightning) and White Dragon (breathes ice!) Oops. :oops:

Nope, I never managed to get any of the Dungeon magazines. They're not available here in Australia. The best I can find to feed my D&D geekery is the occasional KODT magazine. :|

A White Dragon that turns out to be an albino Red? Well, that's sure to 'fire up' any party. Aren't Reds very vain, arrogant, and incredibly powerful? (Well, much more so than Whites in any case).

The person's review - i.e. this...

Tawmis wrote:__________________________________________________________
Changeling By R. Nathaniel Waldbauer
AD&D Levels 8-10
A side-trek, so essentially a 2-pager. This time the party hears about a white dragon that has just shown up. Turns out it’s an albino red dragon. With no treasure. Lame screw job. I’ll never understand why this sort of thing became popular. All it does it encourage the party to be paranoid, which slows things down. This is different than a mimic or trapper. Those are one-shot ‘gotchas.’, almost traps. This is just an intentional screw-job. LAME.

__________________________________________________________


...sounds a little like Trump's tweets. "Sad!" But yes, I agree - it seems likely that his character became barbecue. :twisted:
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Tawmis » Wed Dec 20, 2017 11:38 am

Rath Darkblade wrote:A White Dragon that turns out to be an albino Red? Well, that's sure to 'fire up' any party. Aren't Reds very vain, arrogant, and incredibly powerful? (Well, much more so than Whites in any case).


Yes! Quite so. Among the Chromatic Dragons, Reds are considered the most powerful. :)
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Rath Darkblade » Mon Jan 08, 2018 7:34 am

It's been a while and we haven't seen any D&D goodness. Here we go! :twisted:

Top 10 Great D&D Lines by Players... Part 1
(once again...18 March 2005)

10. [PC's were visiting a dimension populated entirely by lycanthropes]

PC: "Why yes, of course I'm a lycanthrope!"
WEREWOLF: "So why do you remain in your human form?"
PC: "Because...uh...I'm a Were-shark."

9. [Party facing Lich, Lich casts "Rock To Mud" on ceiling above party, mud falls down all over party, Lich casts "Mud To Rock" and entraps them. Most of party breaks out using Strength rolls while the Lich prepares some other really nasty spell, one guy doesn't bother.]

DM: "You're not going to try to break out?"
PC: "Look, you're talking to a guy who's only got seven hit points left. I feel safer inside the rock!"

8. [No explanation needed] "Well, Mr. Bigshot Demon Lord, since I freed you from your bondage here and let you sit on the Throne of Ultimate Power, I think the least you can do is recharge my fireball wand for me!"

7. [Immensely strong guy with no real throwing skill prepares to hurl a tree trunk into a raging battle] "My God...this could go anywhere!" [Did it anyway. He was Chaotic Neutral.]

6. [Severely drunk PC (due to a curse) and fully sober PC encounter a female demon. Sober PC prepares himself for a fight, drunk PC has quite something else on his pickled mind.]

DRUNK PC: "Wow! Whatta babe! Hey, baby!"
SOBER PC: "That's one of the succubi, you idiot!"
DRUNK PC: "So she's Italian. She's still a babe!" *hic*
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Tawmis » Mon Jan 08, 2018 12:21 pm

Rath Darkblade wrote:It's been a while and we haven't seen any D&D goodness. Here we go! :twisted:
Top 10 Great D&D Lines by Players... Part 1
(once again...18 March 2005)
10. [PC's were visiting a dimension populated entirely by lycanthropes]
PC: "Why yes, of course I'm a lycanthrope!"
WEREWOLF: "So why do you remain in your human form?"
PC: "Because...uh...I'm a Were-shark."


Hey... they were a thing!

Rath Darkblade wrote:9. [Party facing Lich, Lich casts "Rock To Mud" on ceiling above party, mud falls down all over party, Lich casts "Mud To Rock" and entraps them. Most of party breaks out using Strength rolls while the Lich prepares some other really nasty spell, one guy doesn't bother.]
DM: "You're not going to try to break out?"
PC: "Look, you're talking to a guy who's only got seven hit points left. I feel safer inside the rock!"


Survival skills kick in!

I have some fun D&D stories from this weekend, I will post when I have a little more time.
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Re: The D&D Corner!

Postby Rath Darkblade » Fri Jan 19, 2018 5:16 am

And, to close this little corner...

Top 10 Great D&D Lines by Players... Part 2

5. [Not-too-bright PC warrior meets new PC Beastmaster character, who has a pet wolf. Warrior pats wolf, wolf pants happily. Warrior looks up at Beastmaster and asks...]

WARRIOR: "These taste good with ketchup?"

4. [Overly dramatic mage named Yolarr blasts open a door with a lightning bolt, screams into the darkness beyond.]

YOLARR: "Hear me, foul spawn of darkness! I am Yolarr The Mighty!" [Lights appear in the huge chamber beyond, revealing about sixty demons, all slavering in anticipation. Yolarr doesn't miss a beat before continuing.] "And I was wondering if any of you would be interested in owning a really fine set of modern encyclopedias!"

3. [Encountering a leader of a warrior mercenary group that's blocking the path...]

PC: "Question to Dungeon Master...you said I know something about this group. What do I know?"

DM: "You know they are a mercenary group who respect strength, courage, and determination above all."

PC: "Okay..." [pauses, adopts really bad Austrian accent] "So, you vimpy little girly-persons, you think to frighten me vith your veapons. HA! I laff at you! Let me pass or I vill crush you betveen my biceps like an overripe tomato!"

2. [Most of the party was in a dark alley, calmly talking to a certain Greater Vampire, who, in this campaign, was an NPC who was number one on the "Do Not Mess With If You Value Your Life" list, but the party's Bashkar (bereserker) character had somehow gotten separated from the group and thought the vampire was an enemy, so he went into full berserker rage, charged the vampire from behind, and attacked him at incredible speed.

Unfortunately for him, in this campaign, Greater Vampires are not affected by non-magical weapons, so the attacks did absolutely no damage whatsoever. It took the berserker six rounds to come out of his rage (during which time, the vampire simply stood there and let the berserker hit him), at which point, he threw down his weapons and sat down in a pout...]

GREATER VAMPIRE: (slightly amused) "Finished?"

PC: (Angrily) "You're no fun...you don't die!"

And the number one great line by a D&D player...

1. [During an expedition to track down demons who were armed with advanced technology, somehow the incredibly massive and tough (but rather dumb) warrior named Glutnik (pronounced Gloot-Nick) took the lead paving the path...and stepped on a landmine.

Cue huge explosion of smoke and flame and shrapnel; Glutnik is so tough, however, that even with all the damage he suffered, he took no crippling hits, and staggered out of the smoke a minute later, covered with soot, blood, and metal fragments...and said the immortal line...]

GLUTNIK: (happily) "Glutnik find trap!"
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